Hiking and Discovery

Assalamualaikum and greetings dear Bits and Pieces readers,

Currently in Malaysia, mountain and hill hiking are becoming a fad. Facebookers elate when they find new hill hiking spots and people race to post their hiking adventures on Instagram. These did not go unnoticed. Both responsible and irresponsible hiking trip organisers mushroomed and more people get sucked into the euphoria.

The hiking "fad" isn't necessary a negative connotation, though. It actually presents another method of spending time aside from the typical activities of shopping, dining, gaming, clubbing, and watching Korean soap operas. It began to dawn on people that they can still have a blast and de-stress while sweating.

There are also those who went one step further and find hiking therapeutic. Somehow, the world made much more sense, serenity becomes less elusive, and God is all the more omnipresent. I would like to believe that I'm in this category.


1. Constant steep trail = Never ending trials
Mount Datuk in Rembau is the most popular place to hike for those who want to transition from hill hiking to mountain hiking. 80% of its trail involve steep and tiring ascends. I remember pushing myself hard, controlled my breathing, and asked hikers descending the mountain how long more until we reach the top.

One of a few set of stairs leading to the top of Mount Datuk

Raihan, a friend of mine, told me that this steep trail symbolises the never ending trials that we face in life. The capability to breath in oxygen always comes with responsibilities, hardship, anger, annoyance, misunderstanding, and sometimes, the urge to just kill one self. This is simply how ALLAH had designed life to be.

2. Effort, patience, and perseverance always pay off
Still, ALLAH had also decreed that those with effort, patience, and perseverance will pull through. If not in this world, the next.

Kutu Hill is NOT a hill; its a mountain. Situated in Kuala Kubu Bharu, it rises 200+ meters more than Mount Datuk. If Mount Datuk is tiring, Kutu Hill is grueling. My knee gave way and my brother literally had to carry me down for a short while. Its not that the Kutu Hill trail is steeper, but it's longer, wilder, and lonelier. In comparison to Mount Datuk, not many people hike here.

View from the top of Kutu Hill

The Kutu Hill trail reminds me of my PhD studies a bit; a long, winding, and lonely odyssey which has not yet end! To quote Linkin Park, "Uphill struggle, blood, sweat, and tears". Nevertheless, each time I reach the peak of the mountain (or hill) that I'm hiking on, it gives me optimism that I can finish it. This also applies to my ambition of becoming a novelist (despite not being able to fulfill promises to my readers)! 

3. Its the journey that matters

Although messy and unpredictable, its often the journey that matters. There's no meaning if we achieve success by cheating and manipulating. The journey should pain us so that we grow wiser and kinder.  

This hit me when I hiked Botak Hill in Puncak Alam. The top was completely bare like a bald head (hence the name Botak) but the trail was pleasant. We were greeted by ferns, huge boulders, and birds freely roaming the vast sky.

Botak Hill trail

4. Compassion and teamwork
I felt pain not at Botak Hill but at Batu Chondong Hill in Ulu Klang. I fell when I was climbing down a tree. My friend Aisyah, not me, was traumatised with the incident (not to worry, I'm fully recovered, alhamdulillah).

The tree that I fell from, Batu Chondong Hill trail

Truthfully, I did not felt pain when I fell. Maybe I was in a daze but I also like to think that it was because Azratee and Aisyah comforted me. They were willing to slow down to my injured pace and hold my hand as I descended. I, who tends to be secretive, came to terms to the fact that expressing can reduce emotional hurt. 

5. Learning is infinite
To be honest, Batu Chondong Hill trail was the fastest hike for me in comparison to Kutu Hill, Botak Hill, and Mount Datuk. My knee didn't hurt one bit! Indeed, with experience comes skill. But, falling down from a tree, teaches me that I must never feel over confident. I should always be humble, careful, and keep on learning to become better. 

Gasing Hill is an educational jungle set in bustling Petaling Jaya, my very first hiking trail as an adult. Hence the word "educational" absolutely hit home with me because I had learned my very first lesson there; hiking is therapeutic. I remember that I was almost near crazy trying to include waqf (Google it!) into my economic model.

Gasing Hill trail

6. History is a great teacher
History has always been close to my heart. I was the best student for history during PMR (a centralised exam for Form 3 students during my time) and History of Mathematics was my favourite subject during undergraduate studies. My first publish book (which I retracted, by the way) was inspired from that subject.

People always say that we should forget the past. That, in my opinion, is utterly wrong. We have to accept and learn from it because the past is an invaluable teacher. Events in the past, can help guide our thoughts, feelings, actions, and decision making. For instance from the Quran:

And We certainly sent Noah to his people, and he remained among them a thousand years minus fifty years, and the flood seized them while they were wrongdoers. (Surah Al-Ankabut: 14)

This verse teaches us that even 950 years of effort can't change people's minds. It is really up to the individual themselves. Yet the Prophet Noah pressed on because he knows that ALLAH counts his effort; not whether he succeeds or not. As such, we should internalise these lessons that had occurred in the past when we read this verse. Not to mention, finance and economic, two out of many "professional" and "real" areas, still rely heavily on historical data for forecasting.

It is the reason of history that I attempted the Mount Berembun trans Telapak Buruk trail in Pantai twice. During the first try, I wasn't able to reach the World War-II B-24 Liberator air craft crash site. Still eager to see, I attempted the second time and made it to the site. Indeed, nobody can ever know how death may approach.

Remains of the aircraft on Telapak Buruk

 
7. Living reminders of God
It is hard to shake the awe that every hill and mountain hiking has to offer. The animals serve as a reminder that ALLAH is Al-Khaliq (The Creator) while the ruins elucidate ALLAH as Al-Mumeet (The Destroyer). The fruits and rushing water speak of ALLAH Al-Muqeet (The Feeder) while the view from the mountain top shouts ALLAH Al-Aliyy (The Most High). Easy trails echo ALLAH Ar-Raheem (The Merciful) while the arduous ones constantly whisper ALLAH Al-Hafiz (The Guarding One). When I rest and put my head on the bare ground in prayer, I can't help but hear ALLAH Al-Mujeeb (The Responding One). As I descend down the hill, got in my car, and head home, my heart sings ALLAH Al-Ahad (The One).

Broga Hill in Broga

The House Dilemma

Assalamualaikum and greetings dear Bits and Pieces readers!

I am now a part time lecturer teaching Foundation of Islamic Finance at a public university in Malaysia. It was not long before I realise that students, no matter how boring the topic may be, pay attention when the lecturer is passionate. One such occasion happened when I was arguing on the necessity of a house bought through mortgage.  

Source: Binyamin Mellish

No, it is not the purpose of this post to debate on whether Islamic home financing is truly Islamic. Instead, it is to point out some obvious realities of home financing that people dismiss simply because the realities are not attach to any financial nor economic jargon. It is my personal opinion that when  making decision to buy a house, one should also be aware of the realities and repercussions attached to that decision.

1. Does house equates to a home?
Pause and observe; do all house owners view their house as a home? Some view their house as a long term investment which is not wrong; but some also view their house as a burden. Burden in two senses; burden of debt and burden of not having a real home. A real home is where we view our house as a sanctuary from the elements; both realistically and metaphorically. To describe the latter, most people are working long hours just to pay off the house. This causes fatigue and instead of feeling happy to spend time with their family when they get home from work, they would feel disgruntled. Hence a house that should by default be a home, becomes a mere symbol of financial security. I used the strikethroughs on purpose.  

2. Does house ownership equals to fulfillment of basic need?
Most tolerate the long working hours and family time because they argue that owning a house is a basic human need. House provides shelter and protection for their families, after all.
The fact of the matter is, other choice of housing like renting and mobile homes also give similar protection too. In relation to this, developed countries of Europe chose to rent instead of buying which could be mind boggling for people coming from less developed countries. Taking some points from the link, potential house owners should consider other costs attached to owning a house such as insurance and upkeep before making their final decision.

3. Does a house on a mortgage is truly our house?
It is always wise to be aware of the fact that the house we own is not really our house; at least not until we finish paying the monthly installments that often take up decades. I repeat, in underline and bold, decades. Until then, the house that we see as a financial security, is actually a mirage.
How so?
Consider these risks; losing our job, savings and investments dried up, major health issues (assuming no health insurance was taken), economic crisis etc. Wouldn't this affect our ability to pay the monthly installments? And when we can't pay, the bank will seize our house. Notice the strike through.
I had a conversation with my husband regarding this which I would like to add as a side note. Imagine that we face a religious, morale, and/or principle clash at work. But because of the need to pay down debt, we would easily step on our principles instead of quitting the job. It is as though we become slave to our employers due to debt which had enslaved us in the first place. It's as though we are worshiping two gods without us even realising.

4. Is living within our means and in moderation are backward concepts in this modern era?
This question reminds me of this book, "Voltaire's Bastards: The Dictatorship of Reason in the West"  which I am still reading. John Ralston Saul, the author of this book, strongly critiques the technocrats that ivy league universities are producing. According to the author in page 22, technocrat is "the man who understands the organization, makes use of the technology and controls access to the information, which is a compendium of "facts"". The education they receive, according to him, emphasized more on technical jargons instead of analysing real problems. Even when the problems were address, the solutions were often superficial.
Corresponding to this, it is to my believe that living within our means and in moderation are not backward concepts at all. Instead, they are two simple yet wise principles grounded to reality. Hence, one should not feel dejected when (s)he is being accused by the community as idiots for not taking a mortgage. You are merely considering your physical and mental capacity to shoulder debt.

I would like to end this post with a clarification. I am not criticising those who have taken mortgage. I am merely pointing out the fact that acquiring a mortgage is not necessarily an indicator of financial security. At least, that is what I believe. What do YOU believe?

Freedom Fantasy

Assalamualaikum and greetings dear Bits and Pieces readers!

Excluding prisoners in jail and those poor souls trapped in modern slavery, everyone has freedom. But that my friend, is a foolhardy assumption. To prove this claim, let's begin with the most basic; the meaning of slave.

Oxford Dictionary defines slave as (especially in the past) a person who is the legal property of another and is forced to obey them. This includes:
- A person who works very hard without proper remuneration or appreciation.
- A person who is excessively dependent upon or controlled by something.
- A device, or part of one, directly controlled by another.   

Photo credit: Comfreak

Definition 1: A person who works very hard without proper remuneration or appreciation.
All around the world, we find cases of employees being paid wages that are lower than the inflation rate. In the United States, one of the economic super powers, millions of full time workers still rely on the government to get by due to their low pay. You could say that they get low wages because not much skills are required for the job. The fact of the matter is different, however. According to Low Wage Work, "these jobs require knowledge, patience, care and communication".

Not more repulsive than child labour, though. Amnesty International claim that companies like Samsung, Sony, and Microsoft had workers as young as seven years old working in hazardous environment. This brings memories about the infamous Blood Diamond controversy.


Definition 2: A person who is excessively dependent upon or controlled by something.
I personally believe that this form of slavery is the most widespread but always ignored.

Have you ever noticed how the media uses certain words to manipulate you? I would like to give you an example that was pointed out by The Patriots from this article piece that they uploaded in their Facebook page:

A normal person would just read this piece and concur that it is beyond a shred of a doubt that Majapahit relics were there in the Malacca river. Not many would notice the word "possibly" and "believed" in the first paragraph which means Majapahit origin hasn't actually been confirmed. Also notice that it was "a group of professional divers" and not archeologists (persons having solid knowledge of history) who had found these relics.

However, one not need go far to see this kind of slavery in action; it can happen within our family circles too. Abused spouses almost always believe that it is their fault for being abused; a classic example of how one can control another. In fact, there are also cases where one just succumb to the abuse because they feel like they can't survive without their partner.

Then there's the case where an individual feels pressured to conform with society's view. A person over 40 can feel dejected when s(he) is still single, a person can feel depressed when s(he) only has a cheap car, a teenager can feel ashamed with his peers for still being a virgin, and multitudes of other examples.

This can result in people becoming a slave to their desires too. To get an expensive car, (s)he would be willing to take bribe and a teenager can resort to rape to satisfy his lust. 


Definition 3: A device, or part of one, directly controlled by another.
This definition doesn't concern humans.


Thus the truth is, we are slaves to something or someone. You can deny it all you want.

But remember, we are human beings endowed with freedom of choice; we can choose who our masters are. And it's high time for us to choose. 

In the name of Allah , the Entirely Merciful, the Especially Merciful.
[All] praise is [due] to Allah , Lord of the worlds -
The Entirely Merciful, the Especially Merciful,
Sovereign of the Day of Recompense.
It is You we worship and You we ask for help.
Guide us to the straight path -
The path of those upon whom You have bestowed favor, not of those who have evoked [Your] anger or of those who are astray.

(Quran - Chapter 1)

 

How to Reduce Conflict in Relationship

Assalamualaikum and greetings dear Bits and Pieces readers,

No matter how loving and caring a relationship is, conflict is omnipresent. Friction occur between husband and wife, friends fight, and children refuse to be in contact with parents. Of course, there are also many other relationship examples.

However, don't give up on relationships just because of conflicts. Albeit there are circumstances that can't be fixed, there is always the possibility to minimize if not resolve them.


1. Be patient
The first thing that we feel before a conflict starts is dissatisfaction which is closely followed by anger. Instead of letting these feelings escape from our mouth or God forbid through violence, try and control ourselves. Take a deep breath; do whatever you can do to calm yourself. As Muslims, we should say "a'uzu billahi minash shaitonir rojim" (I seek refuge in ALLAH from satan) because anger can lead us to doing evil deeds. It is also helpful to remember this, whether you be Muslims or not:

"The strong man is not one who is good at wrestling, but the strong man is one who controls himself in a fit of rage." (Prophet Muhammad)

2. Be understanding
Try and imagine being in the other person's shoes. Our husband might be stressful from his underpaid job, our friend might be having a family problem that they don't want us to worry about, and our parents were just trying to advice us for the better. This act of empathy can definitely reduce the anger and dissatisfaction that we feel inside.

3. Be thankful
Recall how our husband would soothe us whenever we're in pain, remember how our friend helped us whenever we are in trouble, and remind ourselves the sacrifices made by our parents. This act of reminiscing should be able to subside the remaining anger inside us. A Malay proverb comes to mind:

"Hancur badan dikandung tanah, budi baik terkenang juga" which in simple English means good deeds are remembered forever even though the person who committed that act of good deeds had passed away.

4. Take a timeout
Should number 1, 2, and 3 didn't work, pull yourself away from that person. Give ourselves time by taking a walk alone or jog or whatever it is that can calm us. Bear in mind that giving ourselves time is never the same as running away from problems. So when I say "whatever it is that can calm us", I don't mean drugs, alcohol, violence, and the likes.

By giving ourselves time, we are escaping from negative energy so that positive energy can come in. This allows us to become patient as well as to try and understand where the other person is coming from.

5. Communicate effectively
Unfortunately, being patient, understanding, and thankful cannot solve conflicts. Same goes to pulling away from conflicts. Although there are special cases of conflicts that is better for us to settle with the strategies mentioned, most conflicts should be discussed with the person we are in conflict with.

This discussion however doesn't necessarily need to be done right after the conflict. Create the right mood to talk. Choose an appropriate time where both have cooled down and can think rationally. I firmly believe that relationships can flourish when both sides are able to communicate the right way.    

6. Be forgiving
It is an undeniable fact that some conflicts come to fruition because of past misunderstandings. Even though we had already discussed it with our significant other before, we still can't let go, we still can't seem to forgive. I admit, to forgive someone is hard; but the reality is, not forgiving only interferes with our happiness.
Let's view forgiving as an important decision. If we forgive, we get to be happy; if we do not forgive, we will suffer.


Whoever and wherever you are at, I sincerely hope that you will be able to minimize conflicts. I pray that we all can have healthy relationships :)

What to do when we are "Festively Challenged"

Assalamualaikum and greetings dear Bits and Pieces readers,

It has been a little over two months since I posted anything here. I was consumed by my studies before an overwhelming sense of lethargic swallowed me whole. I thought this lifeless feeling is normal because it is a sign that I'm doing something of impact to the world. I'm sure this is the same case for all of us. There's always a point in everyone's life where we want to inspire others, mend a broken system, and make this world a better place.

But it soon dawn on me that doing too much or too little of almost anything is hazardous to the inner self. In my case, everything suddenly transforms into a burden. Washing dishes was tiring, dressing up became daunting, getting up from bed seems unnecessary; and when I did got up, I shifted my focus to watching movie after movie online, or constantly scroll down the world of Facebook.

Then like the blaring sound of a fire alarm, I was forced to consciousness. My conscience began to function as I stirred. I came to realize that I am slowly losing part of myself to the fire caused by non other than me. My love for reading had gone, my passion for writing and blogging disappeared, and most importantly, the root of optimism had been pulled out while hopelessness was budding inside of me. As a result, I was brimming with worry and fear, and it was projected on my illogical theoretical model.

Admitting that I have a problem was my first brave step. Realizing that it's affecting my potential was my second. Then I took these rites:



1. Reality check: It takes hard work, patience, and sufficient rest to have a high chance of success.
(To know why I write "high chance of success" instead of "definite chance of success", go directly to rites number 4 and 5)

My first attempt of designing my theoretical model was replied back with general comments. The second attempt was returned to me with countless red inks. I was at my wits end in figuring out my theoretical model. I was at it since morning. If you include the first and second attempt, then I was at it for months.

On top of that (and to my utter embarrassment), I've been trying to understand the research method that I'm applying since last year. As my background was Mathematics and Finance, it really took a lot of time, hard work, and patience to grasp the theories as well as the workings of both conventional economics and Islamic economics. So I felt furious at my inability to perfect my model despite numerous attempts and learning of theories within an expansive time span.

I glanced at the clock. It was only 9.30pm, a very early time for me to go to bed. But I forced myself to leave my study table, brushed my teeth, and went to bed. In bed though, the dysfunctional theoretical model still lingered on my mind.  
 


2. Call out for support from someone who is emphatic and non-judgmental.
All of a sudden, I felt the weight of past dark events piled atop that theoretical model. They proceeded by shattering me into pieces. I had no control of my tears nor my wailing. I quickly wrap myself and curl inside my fleece blanket to muffle out my crying. But somehow, my wailing escaped from the blanket.

"Why are you crying, honey?" my husband asked worriedly.
But I refused to leave the comforts of the blanket. My being declined to face my husband. My voice doesn't want to spell out my predicament.

Realizing that I was unwilling to talk, my husband hugged me from behind instead and lay down with me in silence until I stop crying. Soon after, I was able to face him and I spilled out my guts. We talked and the burden slowly lifted.


3. Take a moment and observe the natural world.
After the fajr prayer (a prayer offered to ALLAH before sunrise), I didn't sleep back like I use to. Instead I pushed the curtains from my window and watch rays of sun light slowly penetrate the remnants of night. It was an uplifting experience. After having breakfast, I tackled my theoretical model once again. While studying, I felt like a barrier was lifted and I can finally see what was wrong with the model.  As the night slowly beckons, I took a moment to myself and watched the sunset and discoloration of the sky from our high rise apartment.

4. Reality check: Life is not and will never be perfect.
After watching the sunset and praying, I checked my theoretical model for the last time. There's still some uncertainty but I know that I had given it my all. Thus without further ado, I printed and handed the theoretical model to my supervisor for his review.

There will be two possible reviews; good or bad. We have to accept that no matter how hardworking and patient we are, no matter how sufficient our rest is, those two possibilities still exist simply because this world is never meant to be perfect.
  

5.  Constantly repair our relationship with God.  
There is never really a definite success in this world. However, should we constantly repair our relationship with God, there's a 100% chance of inner peace despite ANYTHING. On top of that, we are guaranteed success in the next world. Hence, this is the most important rite that we must hold on tight to. And should we ever forget the rest, this fifth rite will remind us of them. 

Making Peace with the Story of Our Life

Assalamualaikum and greetings dear Bits and Pieces readers,

We often wonder how our life came down to this. Instead of traveling around the world, we are still stuck at the same place. We thought that marriage are full of roses but we forgot that roses have thorns. The high pay job we now have comes at the expense of family. We couldn't quite grasp the fact that we are condemned to die at such young age. And there are many other downs unique to each of us.

However we know, lamenting can never help. We acknowledge the fact that we only have this one life here on earth, so we need to hold ourselves together. Surely, there is peace amidst all of these.


1. Count our blessings 
Try and list all the favors that God has given us. For instance eyes to see, a nose to smell, a tongue to taste, ears to listen, legs to walk, clothes to keep warm, family to go home to, friends to hang out with, a car to travel, and many others. You'll find that the things that God has already given us is uncountable.  

"And He gave you from all you asked of Him. And if you should count the favor of Allah, you could not enumerate them. Indeed, mankind is [generally] most unjust and ungrateful." (Quran: Chapter 14, Verse 34)

2. Observe those who are less fortunate than us
We always envy those who have more than us. But we rarely see people who own less than us. For example the homeless, people in war torn countries, people who live a lonely life, unemployed, etc. So force ourselves to look at those below us. As a result, we become more grateful and at peace with ourselves.

"When one of you looks at one who stands at a higher level than you in regard to wealth and physical structure, he should also see one who stands at a lower level than you in regard to these things (in which he stands) at a higher level (as compared to him)." (Sahih Muslim no. 2963)

3. Know that God is the Most Compassionate, the Most Merciful, and the All Knowing
The One God in Islam has many names. Two of them are Ar-Rahman (Most Compassionate) and Ar-Rahim (Most Merciful). This means that ALLAH loves and never have ill intention towards us whatsoever. In addition to that, the name All Knowing suggests that everything that happen in our lives, whether good or bad, happens for a reason. Thus, even when we are in a bad situation, do not be angry at God because it happens with love and reason. Instead, accept it with a humble heart.

4. Effort, pray, and submit (EPS)
Being grateful is not enough, however. We should do something about our situation whatever it may be. Unemployed? Be your own boss by starting a business. Marriage in shambles? Set up an appointment with a marriage counselor. In between efforts, pray to God that HE'll give you better. Submit yourself to him and understand that: